You, Me and Destiny

My dreams had an ambitious bent before I saw you first,

I was a teenager then I knew that one day this love would burst.

You came out of nowhere and helped me stand on my feet,

But you went away so quickly, like God had shown me a glimpse and then taken away my treat.

A penny fell out of your pocket and I still hold that dear,

I have grown up now, I will be married to someone else I fear!

My hungry eyes have searched for your image in every place I go,

I never found those big, brown, kind eyes again in any face nor that aristocratic nose and eyebrow.

I knew in that one spellbinding moment, when I met you, that you were my soul mate.

For years I've been searching everywhere for you, my love, this love does not seem to abate.

My hopes grew thinner with every passing day,

Maybe I would never find you, maybe that is God's way.

****

I am married now to another and we have our family, 

I am the perfect wife and mother, there is just one single anomaly.

I still don't love my husband, not that he isn't a good man,

He is kind, loving and affectionate. A perfect husband for a wife's lifespan.

I have surrendered myself to this life, though my soul is still not into it.

My interest in life is draining slowly bit by bit.

And then one sunny day, I saw you again!

You had grown old, it was like your jet black hair had got a white stain.

You had never been a breathtaking Greek Apollo,

There was some charm around you, an air of happiness, as if your spirits could never be low.

You were still the same; In the bleak, black world, you were still my sun.

I had duties towards a husband and a son now, fine threads of relations fate has spun!

Still I couldn't stop myself, my body was being pulled towards you by an invisible string.

I heard myself asking you, if you remembered that we had met, seven years ago, one fateful spring!

You said you didn't and that hurt me like a thousand needles pricked at once.

The one I loved with all my heart and soul didn't consider me in his list of dear ones.

Tears were threatening to brim over my eyes and overflow,

I didn't want you to see that fate had given me a heart-breaking blow!

I said my goodbyes and turned away from you just as the first tear drop fell,

I felt such despair, such loneliness that I can never tell!

I felt disgusted with myself that I had loved you all along,

Your penny that I had always cherished slipped through my fingers as, to me, it did not belong.   

****

I saw my penny slip through your fingers and waited for you to go,

I knew it belonged to me, it was one of a kind, my father had given it to me long ago.

I had dropped it that day on purpose, to see if you would keep my token,

I had snitched away your hairpin as a gift, a memory of yours I had taken.

You had just grown out of childhood then, my lovely girl!

How could I have asked for your hand then? I had thought fate would, in due course,unfurl.

I had thought that for you to live in luxury, I would have to make some money.

I left our birth land and returned many years later, to me our future looked sunny.

It never crossed my mind that you would belong to someone else so fast,

Then I saw you with your husband and son on each side, you hadn't seen me, I felt like an outcast.

I felt devastated, my soul had lost its purpose to exist,

The sunny future had been covered now by a thick, black mist.

The sorrow was so deep that even tears refused to come out,

It was as cold as the arctic wind, my tears had frozen without doubt.

I thought about it for days together and felt that maybe I was your silly teenage crush.

You were the love of my life! Was I as unimportant as a particle of dust ? So easy to brush?

I had dreamed about us together, like a happy song.

It is hard to digest that it is to another that you belong!

And then today you saw me. In your eyes, love as intense as mine I could see.

It took all my life's control not to stop you from going free.

You had a family and duties you could never let go,

If you knew that I cherished you too, you would be ecstatic, but eventually you would feel deep guilt and sorrow.

For then you would have to choose between me and your life in which you have perfectly fit,

You would choose me and I do not want you to leave your family and split.

So I replied that I don't remember you, knowing it would hurt you a lot,

You, my love, have no idea how much it hurt! What a pathetic fate it is in which we are caught!

"I don't remember seeing you", Hah! That was the greatest lie ever!

When it was your face that will be impinged upon my memory, my dreams forever!

You turned away disgusted and I saw your tear reflect the sunlight.

I cannot help this hurt, my love! Our fate is cruel! Fate that we can never fight!

You will be happy with your family, your path is set.

I have to find a new reason to live, this memory I have to somehow forget!

Yet I have a feeling I can never let go of your face and that expression.

At present all my feelings in life, except dejection, have reached a point of cessation.

So many words have been defeated by silence that I wish my silence had words, my dear.

Your laughter, your words, your love for me I'll never get to hear!

We loved each other, but destiny never made us meet at the right time,

These words are ringing in my ears, like haunted sounds of a broken wind chime.

I was never a believer in rebirth, but now I want to be!
Maybe destiny will be kinder next time, we will be together my love, you and me.....

Rain-The movie

The Proud sun has been covered by the grey clouds again,

This is a sure indication, a certain event preceding the heavenly rain.

The clouds have started to become heavy,

The birds are going back to their safe shelters in a bevy.

The winds howl and rejoice with a fierce deadly velocity,

The plants sway to the wind awaiting the rain with an intense hungry voracity.

Those that are sturdy against the wind remain,

others unable to bear the ferocity are slain.

The excitement reaches a feverish peak,

The clouds start exhibiting the power with bolts of lightening, language of thunder they speak!

The weakest cloud of them all, lets go of the courage first,

That is when it drizzles lightly, soothing the dry earth's thirst.

The land unaware of the doom ahead thinks of it as a gift and releases a sweet smell,

it always remains in our memories as a beautiful experience in which we revel.

Slowly the rain gains a little confidence and power,

The leaves, covered with a layer of dust , get a cleansing shower.

The rain drops down now with all its might.

It then looks as though the land and the sky are having a fight.

The rain now has no mercy or self control

Its like the sky is refusing to stop, no matter how much the God's cajole.

The drizzle which was pleasant has become a pain as such,

The rain drops are now sharp stones hurting wherever they touch.

People run hither-tither to avoid being drenched, across the street,

Its like the rain laughs merrily while making people dance on their feet.

The rain loses all its energy in this outburst,

It slowly starts thinning, having shown everyone its worst.

The clouds are meek again in front of the sun,

the birds start flapping their wings , trying to dry them, they start having fun.

The dogs release all the water in their fur,

A miniature rain they create for those who are close, in the style they always prefer.

The plants so green and clean, free of all the dirt and dust smile at everyone.

A few stubborn rain drops, refusing to leave the leaves, glitter in the shining sun.

They seem like diamonds sprinkled on the green leaves by the Gods,

They adhere to the leaf in a precarious position, against all odds!

Soon, everyone goes back to their hum drum work in a hurry,

The only proof that it had ever rained would be a large puddle, a mud and water slurry.

And for anyone who finds the time to look into the sky,

there would be a beautiful rainbow, bidding adieu, saying a sweet goodbye!

I look at everything sitting by my window and sipping hot tea,

I feel like a celebrity watching a 3D movie, specially screened for me.

I wish everyone would take time to notice these course of events,

You should never neglect them, these little dramatic,enjoyable moments!

All that I Ask!

A flapping random butterfly is like my hope,

these situations in life, these rules and regulations! I can no longer cope.

When I feel confused by everything around,

its like listening to cacophony, with my hands and legs bound!

Frustration wants a vent and nothing is clear

The vent is usually shouting on everyone near and dear!

And then my guilt starts shooting me in the heart

Like an array of arrows fired at me in all directions, leaving me unable to dart!

I start crying, tears of guilt overflowing for all the people I  hurt,

with my voice shrill and tone ruthless, baseless nonsense that I blurt!

I think of what I was before and what have I become,

The world around me is the same, I have changed to bothersome.

I want to be appreciated by the people I love, for them to know my worth,

If I had none, then why did you grant me this birth!?

This confusion rips my mind into a bipolar personality,

Your help is urgently needed God! to regain my functionality.

You by my side, in me, is all that I need.

On a brown dry desert land, you are the germinating seed.

So many prayers of mine, requests, why don't you heed?

Is it true God? that to receive your help we should be of the right religion, caste and creed?

A proof of your presence in my life is all that I ask !

Is that so terribly wrong God?! Would that be too much of a task?

Not One But Three!

Go ahead, dream big and get risky

Say yes to the person you like, go around, grab some happiness and a bottle of whisky!

Spend all the money you have saved, 

Buy all that you can, things you have always craved.

You are accumulating money to enjoy life tomorrow,

 But when is tomorrow ever going to arrive? Will happiness ever sweep away all the sorrow?

When will you really enjoy if you keep postponing enjoyment?

How come our elders always spoke about never postponing work and employment?

Maybe they also spoke about living life in the moment and the people have forgotten about it

Why can’t you delve in the greenery of a valley and not worry about falling into the pit!

Why can’t you just tell the person you love about your feelings,

Why hide, play games, let ego come in and behave like they are business dealings.    

This is the dreamy, impulsive me blabbering about what to do next,

Never caring about the consequences, the circumstances or the present context!

The impulsive me then gets hit by the practical me,

“Are you completely insane? How can you be so spirited and free?”

Life is full of responsibilities; life is fulfilling them degree by degree,

Your parents rely on you, their kid’s success is what they want to see,

Life is not about enjoying a fall and getting hurt in the end, it’s to make the fall as safe as it could be.

Ambition is the quality that makes life challenging,

Love is on and off, the feelings of the people in love around you are always changing.

The person who adores you might not do so tomorrow,

But the money you save today will definitely help you and others, if you let them borrow

People change but the value of money is always constant

What you want to buy today will be replaced by something better and brilliant

Then of course, inconsistent that you are, you will fret over what you bought,

What’s the point in buying something useless, just because it’s an object you sought!   

So listen to my sense and not the impulsive nonsense,

Work hard, sweat it out, plan your future; See life through my lens

The conflict between them goes on and on,

While the analytical me analyses both of them and conclusions are drawn.

The analytical me laughs at both of them and their ongoing war

impulsive and practical mes are still making  faces, each other they completely abhor!

Analytical me listens to their argument and decides whom to listen to,

Time may be wrong for the impulsive me sometimes and sometimes for the practical me too.

Then the decision is taken about whose advise to follow.

My life has always been like this, like a mixed threesome stereo!

I am not one but three, three minds reside in me.

But these three people you'll never get to see, they lie in one body but never are free! 

LOVE YOURSELF!

You love the azure colour of the sky

You admire the serenity of plants quiet and shy

You drown yourself in the taste of everything delicious

You applaud every piece of art, created by plan or spontaneous.

Then why though you love everything else, can't you love yourself!

Because you aren't the colourful sky!?

Because you aren't a sturdy plant!?

Because you aren't delicious neither are you a piece of art?!

You have the element of everything inside you.

Your thoughts are as boundless as the sky,

Your sleep is as serene as the peaceful plant standing by,

You yourself are God's masterpiece, impossible to copy even though they try!

Your life in itself is a tasty dish, a blend of all tastes just made for you to enjoy.

You are everything you want to see outside,

You have everything in you, everything inside.

Love yourself first for others to see your worth,

If you didn't till now, start doing it, take a new birth!

PRECIOUS RELAXATION

HEARTBREAK

POWER

INDIAN NARI

LAZY, RICH & BEAUTIFUL